My Privacy and Self-Actualization

Miracles, enchantments, incantations, witchcrafts, spells, and charms, in short, all those acts improperly termed supernatural, are only possible and can only be explained by the despostism with which some spirit compels us to feel the effects of a mysterious optic which increases or diminishes, or exalts creation, moves within us it pleases, deforms or embellishes all things to our eyes, tears us from heaven, or drags us to hell. Two terms by which men agree to express the two extremes of joy and misery.
"These phenomena are within us, not without us."
-Honroe de Balzac
"Seraphita"

Twenty five years ago today:

September 29, 1985
Sunday

I woke up early (8:15AM) and had the energy to do my aerobics. This time I worked out to the end of the Intermediate workout until my mother called. She was on her way to SAFEWAY.
“Did you want me to pick you up anything?” Mom sweetly asked.

I telephoned Leonard Perillo after I took a nice, warm bath. He wasn’t home, of course. He was probably still in Santa Cruz. If I am not mistaken I recall him saying that he was having dinner with Don Carlson (his business partner) and Don’s daughter.

Don Carlson owns tons of things and has one-hundred million (if not more). He is close friends to a lot of influential folk (and he just happens to be Leonard’s business partner). I can understand why and how Leonard looks up to a man like him. At least I imagine him to look up to him in an admiring businesslike sort of way.

It is 11AM now and I am dressed. My nose is only slightly stuffed up. I am going to mom’s house for breakfast in a little while. The day looks gloomy. I don’t know what the remaining hours of this Sunday will hold for me.

I am thinking of Greg Manachevitz now. He telephoned yesterday.
“You know, Mike, I’m kind of down and out and pissed about not being able to move in to your place. But I’m over it.”
We sort of rekindled our friendship so-to-speak. We weren’t really the closest of friends to begin with. He’s okay. I guess there are no hard feelings. He made a comment of how money won over friendship. In reality, it was my privacy and self-actualization that won over both of them (money or friendship). I am all by myself.

I went to mom’s house for breakfast and hung-out for a good while. I came to my pad to nap only to return to mom’s house. I accompanied mom to South Shore Shopping Center to find Helen something for her birthday (October 1st). We ate lunch at the Hof Brau BBQ place.

I remained at mom’s house until close to 6:30PM when I decided to head back to my pad. I watched ‘At the Movies’. While watching the tube my phone rang. It was Leonard Perillo.
“What are you doing?”
“Oh, I’m just watching a movie.”
“Do you want some company?”
I hesitated for a second and automatically answered, “Sure.”
Leonard came over.

Mike Miller called me as well. I didn’t bother to mention the Greg Manchevitz moving-in incident.

Leonard arrived while I was watching ‘Spielberg’s Amazing Stories’ and the ‘New Alfred Hitchcock’. We talked a lot. I believe it is clearly understood that it really doesn’t matter what he has or what he does. I like him as my friend for the type of person he is and that’s ‘it’. He stayed the night and we slept together ‘better’ this time.

"What I mean by enchantments are those stupendous actions taking place between two membranes in the tissue of the brain."
-Honroe de Balzac
"Seraphita"