Flustered

"Can't you at least seem happy, not a heap of misery?"
-The Tudors
Season II, Episode 7

July 31, 1985
Wednesday

Today is Hank’s last day. He is moving on to become an ASR (Account Service Representative). It’s lucky for him (or maybe not-so-lucky for him).

Ryan asked, “Hey Mike, did you ever find that roommate you were looking for?”
“No, not yet,” I answered, wondering if he was interested---or if his inquiry concerned a friend of his.
Ryan replied, “I’ll let you know.”
And so, I guess I’ll find out why he asked soon enough.

Work was busy and kind of stressful. It’s only stressful because I had a few argumentative customers.

During lunch Dale and I went to MACY’s where I showed him the Entertainment unit that I had purchased.
“That’s really nice, Michael!”
I think he was impressed.

I drove home and was able to lie down for a bit when Lorraine called.
“Your shirt has not been found yet,” Lorraine announced.
Her statement only compounded my current depression.

I left for the gym. Lorraine gave me a lock to use. The good news is that my two shirts were still in the same locker that I used the other day. All I could think was “Those people check like they clean their asses!” Unbelievable, the shirts were still in the locker where I left them.

After my workout I shared the good news with Lorraine, when she took the opportunity to be courageous once again.
“So, what are you doing the rest of the night?”
I gulped, “Uh…I’ll probably just lounge and watch something on my VCR.”
It seemed obvious to me that she wanted an invitation. So I had to do it.
“Would you like to come over?”
“Sure,” she said.
The funny part is that I kind of purposely lost her while she was following me in her car. It didn’t matter because she telephoned me when I arrived home and I gave her precise directions. The plan was for us to watch the Steve McQueen, Dustin Hoffman film “PAPILLON”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f526tn-pNMY 

Greg Manachevitz telephoned.
“Hey Mike! Want to get together to party tonight?”
“I don’t think it’s a good time for me tonight.”
“Ah, well I’ll call you tomorrow about getting together around seven-thirty.”
“Well, Mike and I may go biking around that time—but we’ll see.”
It was just then that Lorraine arrived. She looked through my SPEIGEL catalog and then we proceeded to watch “PAPILLON”.

Suddenly, Dale telephoned.
Dale asked, “What are you doing?”
It was so eerie. I felt guilty and it was like I was being caught in the act.
“Oh, just watching a movie,” I replied.
“Where is Rachelle? She hasn’t been home and I’ve been trying to call her.”
“I don’t know but I have to go.”
“I understand—you must have company.”
How in the heck did he know?

An hour or so later Rachelle called me.
“My mom is gone now, so I can come over.”
I said, “Okay.” I knew this was a big gamble to say that word with Lorraine there but I was calling her bluff. I just knew that a contemplated Rachelle and Dale game was going on.
When Rachelle said, “My mom might return at one in the morning but it should be okay. I’m going to shower first and call you before I leave.”
“Okay,” I said, thinking it all seemed rather fishy.

Rachelle calls back with Dale on the other line. It was clear that Dale put these thoughts into Rachelle’s mind, allowing her to believe that something was going on. Rachelle was distressed to say the least.
Dale asked point blank, “Michael, why are you letting Rachelle come over? Isn’t Lorraine still there?”
I was shocked. How did he know this! What a meddler! I’ve had it with him (and her for that matter). I couldn’t even say what I wanted to say at that point since Lorraine was right there in the family room and could easily eavesdrop. I finally got off of the phone and gave Lorraine a ‘brush off’ of the conversation.

Rachelle called back again with a major question.
“So, are we broken up?”
“No, but I’m having second thoughts about us. And as for Dale…I intend to terminate our friendship as of tomorrow!”
Lorraine left soon after Rachelle’s third phone call of the night.

I telephoned Rachelle one more time before bedtime. I noticed she wouldn’t say she loved me before we hung-up our respective phone lines.
“I just want you to know that I want my chess set and that box that my brother made for me.”
She sighed and was clearly flustered.

As the painter looked at the gracious and comely form he had so skillfully mirrored in his ART, a smile of pleasure passed across his face, and all seemed to linger there.
-Oscar Wilde
"The Picture of Dorian Gray"

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I Get Around

The impact and pain of a nightmare can be far greater than being struck by a fist, but the emotion behind it, that creates pain.
-John Katzenbach
"The Analyst"

July 30, 1985
Tuesday

Paloma has been on my mind quite a bit lately. My trip to see her will be an enjoyable one. I know it. Sometimes I wonder exactly what she is doing.


I telephoned Rachelle last night but she was on the telephone with ‘who knows who’.
“I have to get off the phone to curl my mom’s hair, but call me back in fifteen minutes,” she said.
“Okay,” I answered.
Rachelle added, “I’m going to go with you on Saturday to that company picnic in Danville, okay?”
“Oh, okay…good!”
As it turned out, I fell asleep and never called her back. The picnic she spoke about was at the home of our second-line manager, Larry. I hope we have a good time.


I get so leery about Rachelle at times. I wonder whether it’s right or wrong for us to even try to be together.
Last night Rachelle said, “Dane and I don’t go out with just any one. They have to be at least twenty-one.”
I thought, “Gee, I should make the same ruling for me for women that I go out with.”


I heard a song this morning by The Beach Boys called “I Get Around”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MELs1QGflrY&feature=related


The song reminded me of Dale Orlando because of his new line of work as an escort driver. It’s amazing how it has led to a bit more. I just hope he doesn’t get hurt in any way. Regretfully, I do care for the friend despite some of his actions.
Yesterday I said to Dale, “I view you in a different light” but that may or may NOT be so true. It is true in a dirty, disgusting way but other than that he’s that same person deep down.


Tim Matthews, another fellow coworker, just startled me by nudging the left front of my car (with his car) while I was parked. This $2.75 parking lot seems to be filling up faster than usual these days. I hope I don’t/won’t have to leave any earlier just to get a parking space.


Staph Redding called this morning at work for some more drama consultation.
“Oh Michael, I just found out that my mother is NOT my real mother!”
“What?” I asked acting interested.
Staph said, “I found out that my so-called Aunt that my Dad flew to see is my actual mother. She lives in New York and has never even seen me before.”
“That’s pretty wild,” I exclaimed as I heard her begin to sob her way into major crying mode.
I think I managed to make her feel a little better. Yet I can imagine (almost) how it must feel to almost feel a loss in ones sense of identify out-of-the-blue at age twenty-six.


My flight for Paris is all set. I did make another phone call to Personal Travel to see how much they will charge me. I am still waiting in the wings to learn the amount due.


Dale received a phone call from his escort boss, Sal Merinos.
Dale explained, “Sal said that the surgeon in Lafayette wanted to meet with me and Angel again at eleven o’clock tonight!”
“Wow Dale, you already have a repeat customer,” I said with a snicker.
He smirked and tossed his head up in the air proudly.
I guess he will make another one-hundred and fifty dollars by getting the Doc off.
I remember Dale had said, “I was a bit scared the first time because he was kind of rough, but I’m sure he enjoyed the excitement of it all.”
In a way, it is appalling—but it is his life.
PHOTO:  Doc, the Snow White Dwarf

The company picnic is this Saturday in Danville. The chicken and ribs are supposed to be good.


I telephoned Rachelle today but she was not at home. I later learned that her friend, Heidi, and Jim, were over at her place. They were all practicing guitar. Rachelle hates Heidi now because Art came over and Heidi said to Jim, “Oh, it’s one of EASY Davies’ boyfriends’ at the front door”.
I guess Heidi must have been trying to swoop on Jim (for her to say that to Rachelle). Yuck! Oh well, I can understand why Rachelle would be pissed-off.
Rachelle screeched, “After I go with Heidi to the Rick Springfield and WHAM concerts she is a later-day friend!”


I was approved for my 25” inch screen JVC television. They’ll deliver it this Friday. I’m excited. In fact I was approved for $3900. The sales lady wanted me to buy a bigger screen TV and/or a stereo but I stuck to what I got: my JVC 25”-inch.


Lorraine Garcia called me via an answering machine message. I called her back and left a message with her mother.
When we did talk Lorraine exclaimed, “I never got that message! I did hear about your forgotten shirt. It has not been turned in to our lost and found.”
“Oh great, I’m all distressed about that. I may just go to MACY’s to see if there’s another one like it.”


Mike Miller and Greg Manachevitz stopped by and watched one of my favorite movies with me (THREE DAYS OF THE CONDOR).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eovei355l4o%20


That Greg is one hell of a character. One wouldn’t believe it! He’s all gung-ho about the idea of moving in with me. And now he’s trying to persuade me to lower the rent to $200 per month. What a dreamer! Mike took Greg home because Greg had to be home by 11PM because it was a work night (per Greg’s parents). Now…he’s twenty-two years old. That’s ridiculous to be living under his folks’ mandates at his age. Mike Miller returned to my place and we watched the rest of the movie.


Lorraine telephoned once again. We did not talk for very long since I had company.
“I just want to tell you that I will look to see if your shirt is now in the lost and found area.”
“Thanks, but I’m losing hope on that shirt,” I said with a laugh.


I think Mike Miller is pretty nice.
Mike said, “I would have liked to move in here if I had a job.”
Then again, I have heard that line before. He’s a QBL (Questionable one) at times. I think. He left. I went to bed.

"You're about to be a very lonely man.  It didn't have to end this way.  You can take a walk--but how far--if they don't print it?"
-Cliff Robertson as J. Higgins
"Three Days Of The Condor" (1975 Film)

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It's Only Temporary

...talking about possessions in general, it is the objects that bear the marks of events in our lives that are the ones most precious to us.

-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 29, 1985
Monday

I cannot find my bike chain—the one that Helen bought me. Well, she bought me the silver chain and I bought the bike pendant on my own. Where is it?

It’s my first day back to work.

Rachelle asked, “Do you want to go to the gym tonight around eight o’clock?”
I didn’t talk to her at all yesterday. It was no big loss. She went to her mom’s company (VIKING FREIGHT COMPANY) picnic. I worked steadily throughout the day. I suppose I will see her at the gym.

During my first break I asked Margaret Lai to accompany me on a walk to my bank teller. She obliged sweetly. She described my niece, Ashley as a ‘living doll’.

Dale looked really thrashed this morning. I guessed that he’d worked overtime with the Escort Service. Ha-ha. At lunchtime he gave me the inside story:

At the age of twenty-two, Dale is literally becoming a male prostitute and reacts proudly of the fact! He explained that he first got this job as an escort driver for the female escorts.

Now Dale is engaged in a few oral acts with male customers. I find it all so degrading in a way. He made one-hundred and fifty dollars last night for ten minutes of jerking-off some surgeon, allowing the surgeon to cum on Dale. Yuck! I cannot believe him. He swears he did it and ‘what’s done is done’.

Dale insisted, “Trust me, Michael, it’s only temporary.”
Dale treated me lunch with the tax-free funds he’s collected. It’s his life. I can’t tell him how to live it.

After work I came home and received a neat plastic ‘BLOW-UP’ heart from Paloma. She’s so sweet to think of me. I sent her a couple of cards, letting her know of my departure flight from San Francisco Airport on September 2nd, arriving Paris the morning of September 3rd, and leaving Paris on September 13th. I hope she’ll be excited that I’m coming to see her. I know I need to get away for a while. My space from Rachelle is definitely necessary.

Rachelle comes to me and nags me about my actions. She does not truly love me. She often cuts me down. I’ll never hear the end of her using that phrase of ‘my past life’. Can’t she understand how some things happened and now it’s over!

I went to the gym and worked out.
Randy scrambled over to me and said, “Hey, Rachelle is here.”
“Oh yeah? I’ll keep my eyes peeled.”
I worked out. Rachelle and I talked near the coed sauna area. She started talking about her guitar lessons.
“Isn’t your guitar practicing just a fad?”
She didn’t like that question at all. Oops. It is a fad as far as I’m concerned.
“Is your working out just a fad?” Rachelle asked, as if passing a hard tennis ball swerve right back into my court.
“No, not at all,” I replied in disagreement.
“My skating isn’t a fad either,” Rachelle added.


The first three days Rachelle began skating with utter excitement. I rarely hear of her skating now. If skating was not a fad she’d do it once or twice a week (like I do my bicycling).

By the way, that COORS Bike Classic is this coming Sunday in San Francisco. I can’t wait to go, just to observe.

I never heard from VIDEO CONCEPTS about my credit application for my 25-inch JVC TV. I wonder what the status may be.

When I arrived home tonight I was thinking about what Rachelle had said: “I don’t like your attitude lately!”
I thought, “Well, shit…that’s another cut-down on me! I’m sick of her knocking me. I’m really tired of it. Words like that bug me. Not to mention the fact that she and Jim engaged in guitar lessons today. It was always ‘Jim this’ and ‘Jim that’. I know it sounds like I’m jealous but I am glad I came home to the receipt of Paloma’s heart.”

I left my black and white checkered shirt at the gym. I hope no one stole it. I really liked that shirt. I’m supposed to call the gym soon to see if it’s still there. Nope. I just lost a shirt. Why is it that the shirts or material items that get misplaced, stolen or lost are the items that you seem to value the most. Bobbie, the one I spoke to, suggested I check the lost and found the next time I visit the gym. I know it won’t be there. I’ve got that kind of luck. Oh well, while I’m in Paris I’ll make up for it and buy some key active sportswear.

I’m watching BEULAH LAND, a movie on tape that my mom let me borrow. It also stars Lesley Ann Warren. I’m also eating a Lean Cuisine dinner that Marty, my ex-roommate, happened to leave in the freezer.

I wonder if Mike Miller or Greg Manaschevitsch would be willing to move-in here at the $300/month rate. Effective August 9th I get a raise of $510 per week. I’m getting up there but I have a long way before I clear my VISA and MASTERCARD debt. Time will tell.

Artists must learn to look, most people never do. They see only what they expect to see.
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

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Armor All

Birth is simply the most puzzling immense duet between human beings; nothing ever again in the life of MOTHER OR CHILD will demand such struggle and mutuality, and possibly forgiveness.
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 28, 1985
Sunday

I woke up and devoted this morning to washing my car. I put Armor-All on my new convertible top. While washing the car with the radio on I heard an advertisement from PACIFIC STEREO. They have their VCR Hitachi brands on sale for three-hundred and ninety-nine dollars. I recalled that Steffanya Redding claims (through a friend who works on VCRs) that Hitachi is the Top of the line brand.
I called mom.
“Mom, do you want to go to Pacific Stereo with me? I heard they have a big sale on their VCR’s.”
“Okay, I’ll get ready.”

I was going to go horse-back riding in Fairfield but Steffanya called to retract.
Steffanya said, “I have to take my Dad to the airport, so we’ll have to do the horse-back riding another time.”
“Oh okay, no problem,” I said, hanging up the phone and thinking ‘Sure, not too good of an excuse…but whatever’.

Mom and I had a bit at McDonald’s and then ended up at Video Concepts at the Southland Mall in Hayward. I bought the ‘top of the line’ Hitachi VCR. And a twenty-five inch screen JVC TV is awaiting approval on my credit. We also went to MACY’s where I bought the Entertainment Unit of a black lacquer color that was on sale for nine-hundred dollars. Debt…Debt…Debt…but at least I’m increasing my Total Capital in the long run. I’m winning I’d say. And to think I’ll be going to Paris a month from now.

I put my VCR together with my ten inch portable and watched a favorite movie of mine called EXCALIBUR.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj7ZIqNZqxU&feature=related

Mom dropped by a little later with Ashley. That was a pleasant surprise. I joined them for a walk to John and Sherri’s townhouse to see the progress of their recently painted kitchen.

I went for a bike ride and saw John Zahn, an old high-school chum. He’s a nice chap. I specifically thought that he was nice because as I rode by he said, “Hi Mike!”

I had a hot dog at mom’s house. Tony and Helen were there watching the Lesley Ann Warren film (CHOOSE ME). I left shortly after the munching of the hot dog.

Later I dropped in on mom and dad and watched the movie FAME with ‘ma and pa’. I started to watch something called VICE SQUAD, too, but went home instead.

I locked my screen door just in case Rachelle decided to pay a visit of her own volition (without telling me). She’s already taken (borrowed) my chess set and that box that Tony made for me. I know she stole one of my prized greeting cards, too.

I watched a bit of LADY CHATTERLEY’S LOVER. I was asleep in bed when Greg Manaschevitsch and Michael Miller called me ‘out of the blue’. I learned that Mike is beginning an X-Ray Technician program at Merritt.
Greg asked, “Hey Mike, did your roommate ever move out?”
“Yeah, he did. If you guys want to move in it would be $300 a month for each of you. Interested?”
“We’ll think on it,” Mike Miller said.
Time will tell. I fell asleep with hopeful dollar signs in my delirious eyes.

Bobbi Rembarger, the one who left Pac Bell, called me ‘out of the blue’ today, too. She may or may not be interested in renting at my place, too. She’s going to give me a call later this week.
Greg actually said, “I’ll come by…probably on Thursday.”

John is never home (the white blond New Waver guy that I met in Los Angeles). Rebel Yell.
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToeY7MkCm0c



My lips were dry and disobedient as I said: "Ought it not be possible to live differently?"
-Franz Kafka
"Description of a Struggle"

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Escort Service

There was always something that made his need for cash immediate and desperate: a bill, the rent, his fines, buying food, something.
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 27, 1985
Saturday

It feels like a Sunday. It’s FOMC Day (Focus on My Car Day). However, I didn’t focus on my car. Instead, mom and I took a drive in to San Francisco to check out the MACY’s Entertainment Units. That was fun. I didn’t—but almost—buy anything. We had a nice afternoon lunch there and proceeded to head back to Alameda.

I telephoned Rachelle but she didn’t want to go out to San Francisco. Dale was out working in San Francisco as a driver for an Escort Service (Geez, the things he gets involved in). He was telling me about his clients for this one gal named Angel that he had to drive around.
Dale said, “I asked Sal, my boss, if he might need another driver since you’re probably available.”
“I don’t know about that,” I said with butterflies in my stomach.
“Well, I made one-hundred and twenty dollars on Friday night!”

“You did? Okay, let me know if he needs another driver.”
“I want you and Rachelle to drop in to see me.”

At 7:30PM Rachelle said, “I don’t have enough time to get ready, Michael!”
I thought, “What a poppycock excuse!”
So, we didn’t go out at all.

I had planned to go to Baxter’s in Concord since I hadn’t been there in so long. Instead, I decided to lounge over at mom’s house. We ordered a pizza and rented two movies: PLACES IN THE HEART and CHOOSE ME (the latter starring Lesley Ann Warren). There were both really good stories. I liked them.


"Why walk with this man? 
You don't love him, nor do you hate him, because all he cares about is a girl and it's not even certain that she wears a white dress."
-Franz Kafka
"Description of a Struggle"

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Mad Max

How the world turns. One day cock-of-the-walk, next a feather duster.
-MAD MAX Beyond Thunderdome (1985 Film)

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 26, 1985
Friday

I woke early and did my five-hundred sit-ups. Then I walked from my house to Morris Landy FORD on Park Street. My car was done and my convertible top was complete repaired. The total damage to me was nine-hundred dollars! I can use the loss on my income tax this year. What a bum rap!

I went to Great Western Savings and consolidated my two IRA Accounts. Hurrah.

I popped over at mom’s house and had some cold cereal while watching ‘The Young and The Restless’ with mom and Ashley. Helen stopped by as did my brother, John. I invited mom and Helen to lunch. We ate at the Ice Cream Dock.

After lunch Helen and I went to lay out by the Islandia Townhouse Recreation pool. A mosquito bit me and it itches—or was it a killer bee? The killer bees are loose in Kern County I’ve heard.

I returned home to a phone call from Dale Orlando.
“Michael, I just wanted to remind you that we are telling everyone that we did WIN as contestants on Wheel of Fortune. We are just saying that we’re on the waiting list.”
“Okay, I got it…don’t worry.”
“I just want to make sure that our stories won’t mix.”

Rachelle Davies called me, too.
“Michael, do you want to go to a movie or something?”
“Sure.”
First, I went to the gym from 6PM-7:30PM. I picked up Rachelle at Danee’s house. Danee’s new date, Dave, showed up. He’s a definite body-builder type but he doesn’t look very well proportioned. He’s kind of fat in some parts if you ask me. He needs to do only aerobics for about eight months. Anyway, the plan was for all four of us to double-date. It didn’t work out that way though. They left. We left. Rachelle was being a bitch.
“I don’t want to see MAD MAX I said! I don’t think I want to see a movie now after all.”
“It’s always the same old story with you!”
It is times like this that I wish I were in Paris.

What finally happened was a visit to a liquor store for refreshments followed by a drive to the Union City Drive-In movie theaters to see MAD MAX.
Before we arrived at the liquor store she was crying in my car and said, “I want you to know that I think about your past every day.”
It bugged me to hear her say that. She can’t seem to let all of that go. So hell—I said it:
“Look Rachelle, that’s your problem…not mine!”

During the MAD MAX movie she had her head turned and was watching E.T in the other theater. I was munching out. I took off my pants to relax. She would only kiss me a few times (with reluctance). When the MAD MAX movie ended Rachelle wanted to leave.
“Don’t you want to see the beginning of the next movie…at least?”
She started crying out loud to the point that I couldn’t take it anymore.
I thought, “Hell, I’ll just drop her off at her house and go to Bobby McGee’s and meet a respectable, mature woman.”
She was literally bawling her eyes out, telling me that this episode reminded her of Norman. Norman was the guy who was charged with assault and kidnapping years ago. I can’t take her anymore. I just can’t.
I thought, “She has my chess set. I want it back. She also took my box that my brother, Tony, made for me in his wood shop class. And I know she stole one of my cards—the guy in his underwear that had the imprint I LOVE YOU.”
I knew it wasn’t the right time to bring these things up that were circulating in my mind.
I decided to ask anyway about the card.
“What happened to that greeting card I had of that guy in his underwear that you were looking at?”
“Oh I don’t know…it’ll turn up,” Rachelle said.
I know she took it. I want my house key back, too. The damn bitch has bit and hit me in one nerve too many.

I dropped Rachelle off. I drove straight home to Alameda. I didn’t feel like drinking anymore. I telephoned her when I got home. I didn’t have much to say—nor did she. As far as I’m concerned I want our relationship to be OVER. It’s not working. She’s calling me selfish and all does NOT help. I need a long break from this one.

"Ain't we a raggity pair?"
-MAD MAX Beyond Thunderdome (1985 Film)

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Semi-Good Natured Terms

In Mexico a coyote is a man who uses sly tricks to make money in ways that cheat the government and the people.
-James Mitchell Clarke
"Luis of Guadalajara"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 25, 1985
Thursday

When I woke up this morning I called the BONAVENTURE Hotel Room Service to inquire about costs to use the Los Angeles Racquetball Club.
“Oh Sir, the Racquetball Club is free to our guests,” she said proudly.
And so, Dale and I went to work out. They only had one set of Universal gym equipment though. How dull! I still worked out a teeny-weeny bit (but hardly at all).

Dale went to the swimming pool but I chose to return to the hotel room. He called me while I was in the room.
“Michael, you have to come back here. The pool boy is just your type!” Dale said with extreme urgency.
I took a quick shower and decided to appear. The pool boy was NMT (Not My Type). He was a nice enough chap. His name was Michael, too. He lives in Pasadena, California.

We ate breakfast at the Sidewalk Café. Our Hotel was very Ritzy-like. The buttermilk pancakes were quite filling. After the breakfast we checked-out and left for the Rodeo Drive vicinity. I bought a telephone shaped like a piano. It’s so neat. It was seventy-nine dollars ‘neat’. The man working at the store (The Price of His Toys) was coming on to me, too. I could tell. He wasn’t exactly MT (My Type) but he was a very nice guy. It was really nice weather-wise in Beverly Hills. It felt so summertime nice.

We left for Highway Interstate 5. Dale and I were in semi-good natured terms. There was a delay by a Highway Patrolman because a truck had overturned. I will try not to mention the delay by the girl in the Cadillac who kept talking to a guy wearing a pink shirt who was in a black Volkswagen with tinted windows.

We stopped at a Rest Area and something unreal happened. I ran into an old high-school classmate of mine from Alameda High School. Her name is Carol Maybee (Carol Taylor is her married name). She had two little girls with her along with a younger sister who was very cute. Carol and I had a nice chat. I’ll have to write to her since we exchanged addresses. She lives in a town called Vista, near San Diego. I will definitely write to her and get the scoop on her younger sister. Ha-ha. I wonder if Carol divorced her husband since he wasn’t with her.

We departed the Rest Area and Dale and I had an argument again about his driving throughout the whole trip.
Dale added, “And I felt like you were trying to get rid of me on Tuesday night when you met Jim, John and Eric.”
I thought silently, “Oh well—things will smooth themselves over soon. I won’t allow him to brainwash me into feeling like I am to blame or was in a position to purposely hurt him…because I wasn’t.”

I bought Rachelle a little Cabbage Patch pin for her to wear. I hope she likes it. We telephoned her at the next Rest Area stop.
Rachelle said, “Did you know Marty moved out today!”
“He did?” I asked, “Well, it’s kind of a relief having the ‘somewhat of an intruder’ leaving.”
As we continued our drive I thought, “I have to check my next phone bill for Marty phone calls and make the appropriate deductions. Marty also has my garage door opener, so I need to make sure I get that, too.”

It was nice to hear Rachelle’s voice.
Rachelle said, “Danee and I were over at your house yesterday and today we were at the pool. It was funny because Marty was flaunting his body in his little shorts.”
I said, “Well, I better not smell any pot in the house…or cigarette smoke!”
Rachelle laughed.
“You know, Danee and I may want to move-in in about six months.”
That comment sounded good, but then again it could have its drawbacks. And I am adamant about NO SMOKING allowed.

Dale and I decided to stop at Rachelle’s house in Castro Valley. It’s 8:25PM and we were in San Ramon, near Crow Canyon Road (practically home). We arrived at Rachelle’s and she immediately takes center stage.
“I want you to know that I have plans for tomorrow to go with Danee to go to this party with Matt.”
I hate her sometimes. What a welcome. She won’t even go out with me and I have been gone for almost a full week. Dale and I didn’t stay there for very long. Dale dropped me off at home. He seemed very solemn. I believe he was disturbed by all of the arguments we had and the ‘not getting along’ incidents. I had kind of foreseen it because it’s like that a lot with us—even at the workplace.

When they asked him about himself, sounding as if it really mattered, he found himself wanting to cry.
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

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Only My Mom Knows

Then all at once he smiled to himself. The assignment had given him an unexpected opportunity to realize an ambition that neither of them knew anything about.
-Stieg Larsson
"The Girl Who Played With Fire"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 24, 1985
Wednesday

Okay…I woke up and Jim’s twin bed wasn’t very comfortable. It was early morning and Jim drove me to the Town House Motel.
Just as Jim unlocked my passenger door he said, “Call me this evening so we can get together. I want to meet Dale, too.”
“Okay, I’m not sure of our schedule but I’ll definitely try to do that!”
Jim added, “I may be going to San Francisco in early September, too.”
“That’ll be great,” I said.
Little does he know that I’ll be in Paris (France). Only my mom knows that I’ll be in Paris.

PHOTO: "Mom", 
Virginia Marie Lucero-Armijo

When I walked inside the motel room I found the door to our room ajar. I walked in and Dale jumped with a startle. He was being an ignorant asshole. I could tell he was planning to leave for San Diego without me. I almost didn’t go with him because of that fact. I figured out his likely plan to leave without me because he took his blow dryer and other accessories out of my GUCCI bag. I could have easily taken a taxicab to the LAX Airport and been back in Alameda in one and a half hours.

Anyway, I went with Dale after all. We left for San Diego, hitting the traffic along the way. It took us about three hours to get there.

Our first stop was Dale’s step-mother’s house. Her name is Barbara and she was nice and very pretty for her age (45). Her house was very messy and unclean. I also met Dale’s step-brother and step-sister.

We continued on to Downtown San Diego and visited the SDC Office (the equivalent of our San Francisco Pac Bell Office). Gail Cadman showed us around. We had lunch with her and a co-worker of hers. Gail is one of the gals we met earlier this year in Oakland. Dale was at a special XEROX training course for three days with her. She’s a sweetie.

After lunch I bought a T-shirt and shorts at some gift shop. Dale bought lots, too. He’s going to have one big American Express bill next month. Dale is having money problems but he’ll have to work that out. I took in the views of San Diego. It looks really clean around there. That’s one thing I liked about San Diego---but I still like Alameda better. After lunch, Dale and I went to visit his step-sister at her workplace, an Antique shop.

We debated on the beach or a visit to Tijuana. We chose Tijuana. And so, we drove in to Mexico. It was really fun. We drove through the Ciudad Industrial and ended up on some unpaved roads that had some rundown shacks and barefoot poverty-stricken kids roaming around. I saw one dog that had what seemed to be one layer of skin next to its ribs, a starving dog! Yikes! I felt bad for a lot of those people. And every problem everyone has in the United States is nothing compared to what they must deal with here. We didn’t even get out of our car. We found the Downtown (El Centro) area of Tijuana but it didn’t look all that appealing. I was reading all of the street signs to Dale as he navigated the tour.

From Tijuana we returned to San Diego again en route to the STARDUST Hotel where Barbara (Dale’s step-mother) worked as a head waitress. We had a few drinks and we left a five dollar tip. Yesterday, Dale left a sixteen dollar tip on his American Express card! What a jerk! Well, we finally left the “dead” STARDUST lounge atmosphere.
Dale asked, “Why don’t you drive now?”
“How about if I drive when we head back home?”

We arrived in Los Angeles, at the BONAVENTURE Hotel by 10PM; whereby, I felt it was too late to call on Jim Koran. I ordered food from the Hotel Room Service. We lounged in the wonderful room, watching the movie FLASH GORDON.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-zHUSSzV9o

We went to bed—even though I wanted Dale to see RISKY BUSINESS but that movie didn’t start until 12:55AM.
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2UVsyVLLcE

We were too tired, so it was time for Dreamland.

"I hope they've given you a good room, the place is half empty, so if you are uncomfortable mind you make a fuss."
-Daphne du Maurier, "Rebecca"

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Hot and Cold

The more you learn the more you realize you don't know, and I felt I had just gotten my foot in the kitchen door.
-Julia Child
"My Life In France"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 23, 1985
Tuesday

Dale didn’t sleep well because he kept thinking of the cockroaches I had mentioned. He felt “uggy” all night long.

We both washed up and headed for McDonald’s for breakfast. The McDonald’s was nicely decorated. Dale found a big KING’s chair that suited him. We ate and then waited a good thirty minutes in the Wheel of Fortune line. Finally, we all went up and took a written test which I passed but Dale did NOT. I can understand though because I was all jittery myself. The test was kind of difficult when you feel that way.

And so, Dale left with the other people who did not pass the written portion. I remained in the waiting area, seated at a desk with about twenty-two other potential contestants. We did a mock role play version of the game. Then we each introduced ourselves. Each of us told a little about ourselves. Then they jokingly told us that NOT everyone could be chosen. Only four or five people were selected of the twenty-three and I wasn’t one of them. I went outside and Dale was waiting for me.
Dale said, “I was so bummed out. I went and got a cherry coke after I vowed not to drink another soft drink for one year.”
“Don’t worry. I feel kind of bad, too.”
So, I got a cherry-coke, too (but that was our last soft drink).

We ended up in Beverly Hills at Ask Mr. Foster’s Travel Agency to redeem Dale’s PNS Vouchers that he’d won at work. The manager there wasn’t very helpful at first. Finally he smoothed out his mood. Dale was planning to use his vouchers for a flight to San Diego. It turned out that it cost too much, so we decided to use the voucher for a payment for one night in a nice HOTEL. I suggested the Rodeo Hotel or Hotel Rodeo but because it is listed as BEVERLY RODEO HOTEL we didn’t stay there. We reserved it for the BONAVENTURE HOTEL in Downtown L.A.

We tried to get our pre-payment back at the Town House Hotel but they wouldn’t pay. So we were going to have to stay there another night! We tried to talk to the owner. We even called the police. We called our Business Office, too, just to get inside information about the owner. Unfortunately, Gina (in our office) answered the phone and she’s not so proficient.

I spoke to Steph, my supervisor, and gave her the latest news. Dale and I had made a deal. We were to tell everyone that we both passed the Wheel of Fortune test but now we’re on a waiting list. And so, that is what I told Steph.

We lounged in our room for a bit and went back to Ask Mr. Foster for our check that would allow us to stay at the BONAVENTURE HOTEL (the next night).

I bitched about wanting to go to a gym somewhere.
Dale said, “It’s your vacation.”
He doesn’t realize that working out is rewarding to me. It makes me feel good. I like to do it! So, I went to the Family Fitness Center in L.A. on West Pico. Dale was going to do an aerobics class but I know he didn’t do it. I don’t know where he went. I worked out until 6PM. Dale had me paged while I was in the shower. There were some QBL’s (Questionables) at the gym. I got a kick out of experimenting with their weight lifting machines. There were some that I’d never seen before. They have air-pressure weights, too. Interesting.

By 6PM we left and were on our way to the Santa Monica beach area looking for a bar called “The Pink Elephant”. The manager at Ask Mr. Foster recommended that we take a peek at it. After some driving around we found it but we first ate at ‘The Omelet Parlor’ for dinner. It was great. We had a good dinner. I had steak Dijon while Dale had veal. This time it was our ‘for sure’ last soft-drinks. We ordered Sassafras (like a black-cherry soda) and a Cream Soda. After our drinks and dinner we went to “The Pink Elephant” for White Russians and Tom Collins cocktails.

Dale and I had been having arguments ‘off and on’ throughout the trip. We are like HOT and COLD running water. Dale chose eight songs on the juke box while I chose only two. He wanted to leave “The Pink Elephant” before I heard my two tunes! There was a guy named Steve (a quiet type) that kept looking at me. Steve smiled and I did the same. He was M.T. (My Type)—but I knew there was no way. I wanted to stay and get to know him but Dale wanted to go. So…we left. Dale was getting all huffy and puffy.
“I want to go to The Rage,” Dale said anxiously.
I sort of did and didn’t. Finally, I said, “Okay, let’s go. But if we go…I’m calling my friend, Jim, from there.”
Dale said sternly, “How long do you plan on staying and digging deeper into a future you can’t foresee?”
I replied, “I don’t know!”

Here is what ended up happening. Dale dropped me off and I went to ‘The Rage’. Dale went ‘who knows where’. I suspect he’s paid at least one hooker while we were apart. Ugh!

While in ‘The Rage’ I went straight for the phone and called Jim Koran.
“I’ll be over in an hour because I just got back home from the gym and I’m latered,” Jim said.
“Okay, I’ll wait.”
While waiting for Jim to appear I met a guy named John Derevey of Westwood. I remember Susan Low, of Moraga, telling me that Westwood was a happening party-town for preppy-types. It’s supposed to be near Malibu. Anyhow, John Derevey was a real new-waver looking sort of fella. We had a nice talk. He couldn’t look at me straight in the eye but I finally got him to. He had very blond hair and extremely blue eyes. He studies music (piano) privately.
“I’ll be getting my own place on August the First,” John said.
I gave him my address and he gave me his. Jim still had not arrived, so John and I went for a walk to the park. We went on a playground and went down the slide like little boys. We almost climbed a roof—but instead—stayed out talking on some nearby steps. I learned more about John. He has a family. His Dad lives in New York while his mom lives in the East with his younger brother and sister. He works as a designer, displaying windows in some select stores. He also designs women’s clothing. He had the neatest blue shirt on, sandals and kind of long shorts. He was super fun though he denies it. I really thought he was fun to get to know.
John said, “Hey, you should come down and visit once I have my place together!”
“That’s funny, my roommate is in the process of moving out also.”
I recalled that Marty had said he would have to start moving out very soon as he’ll have to start his new position in L.A. on July 29th at the ANGELES CORPORATION.

John and I returned to ‘The Rage’. John went to the restroom when I caught sight of Jim talking to a friend. Jim’s friend was deaf. His name was Eric (and a really nice guy, too). We all talked for a while but I felt bad. I had told John Derevey that I’d be right back but I never returned because Jim guided me outside. I showed Jim a picture of Rachelle.
“She’s cute,” Jim said, “She looks a lot like the gal on Superman.”
I wondered if he meant Margot Kidder.
Oh well, we went and had a pizza at a Pizza Joint. His deaf friend, Eric, was there with a bunch of other deaf folks. I found it all so fascinating!
Jim said, “Eric likes you and wants to take you home with him.”
I laughed.
I thought, “Eric is nice but I’m a good boy now.”
Jim asked, “Did you hear about Rock Hudson?”
“No, should I know something?” I asked.
“He’s in Paris dying from a liver ailment but he also has AIDS and it’s all being publicized right now.”
“Wow,” I exclaimed, “That’s kind of surprising news!”

Jim was planning to take me to The Town House Hotel but he said, “Why don’t I take you in the early morning when I have to go to the gym to swim. I can drive you there around six in the morning.”
“That would be great because Dale and I are planning to go to San Diego.”
Jim’s place looked as cluttered as ever. It was nice to see the familiarity of his pad again. We had a nice talk. He completely understands about my relationship with Rachelle. We went to sleep.


Anything happening at half past three in the morning is enough in itself to suggest a crisis.
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

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He's Homophobic

"My pen was silent not because you were absent from my thoughts but because you were too much in them."
-John Adams, 2008 Mini-Series Film

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 22, 1985
Monday

I woke up at 6:45AM and I readied all of my things for the Los Angeles road trip. I telephoned Dale only to learn that he was already on his way.
We took my car in to have the convertible top replaced but they have to special order the top. It’s going to cost me six-hundred dollars!  Shit! What a rip-off!  I left my car there, so hopefully they’ll do all the necessary work by next Friday (upon my return).

Dale and I hopped into his car and went to his house.  Dale changed his clothes as I read parts of his journal that he had on a diskette.  He wrote: “I wish Michael would come to terms with his being gay. I think he’s homophobic.”
I thought, “Dale is his own analytical shithead if you ask me.  I know who and what I am better than any one!”
I continued to read his secret diskette. He wrote: “I wish I could give Dee everything she deserves.”
He also wrote: “I jerked-off with some guy named Dan over the 976 CONNECTOR Line. He lives in IOWA.”
That was about all I could read. That was enough.

We took Andrew to Dee’s house. Then we stopped in to see Dale’s Grandma.  Then I finally met the mysterious Pete Sanchez of Pittsburg.  He is very nice looking (and he is M.T.—My Type). I admitted to Dale that he is M.T. (My Type).
I said, “I promise I won’t tell Rachelle that you introduced us.”
Peter does have a nice look and build but only time will tell.
Dale said, “I’ll tell you what Peter thought of you. So, we’ll see.”

We were on our way to L.A. now. I had mentioned to Jim Koran that we may stop by to see him. I want to visit the CBS Studio to see Brenda Dickson, 'The Young and the Restless' soap star ‘beauty’.

We made it to L.A. in good time! It only took us five and a half hours.  We went straight to the CBS-Television City Studios on Beverly Boulevard. We didn’t see anyone famous. We hung out there for a while, then we went driving all about L.A., Hollywood, Beverly Hills and Santa Monica.

We ate at some sleazy joint called OKI-DOG. It’s an outside joint where all of the Santa Monica Boulevard hooker boys hang-out.  It was disgusting.  Some sleazy hooker boy was talking to me but I made as little conversation as I possibly could while Dale was playing pinball with some other hooker boy. Thank the Lord we didn’t stay there for very long!

We scouted around for a MOTEL or HOTEL to retire in but they all looked like they were all filled with cockroaches. It was cruddy lookin’ out in Hollywood.
Dale suggested, “Why don’t we find a place near Merv Griffin Studios so we won’t have very far to go tomorrow morning.”
“That’s a good idea,” I said.
So we found a place on Sunset near Vine called The Town House MOTEL, Room 217. I remember it well. It was not really clean and the blotches on the bathroom floor looked like cockroaches—but they weren’t. We washed up and then went to a nearby theater on Hollywood Boulevard where we saw the movie “GOONIES”. It was a Walt Disney-like flick.  I mean, it was good but not that great.  Before it started Dale threw an entire box of popcorn on me.  I immediately moved and we remained in separated seats throughout the film.
I whispered, “Just come over to where I’m sitting.”
Dale didn’t budge.  He was being stubborn.  Maybe I was too, a little, because we both remained separated.

After the movie we went to our sleazy bag MOTEL and slept. I slept well, considering the situation.

"I see no reason to label everything. I'm me."
-Scarlett Johansson
"Vicky, Cristina Barcelona"

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A Kind Of Flirtatious Way

A silence fell upon us, during a moment or two, a silence that brought something of discomfort in its train, and stealing a glance at him I was reminded more than ever of my Gentleman Unknown who, cloaked and secret, walked a corridor by night.
-Daphne du Maurier
"Rebecca"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 21, 1985
Sunday

I made up for not doing my five-hundred sit-ups by doing one-thousand this morning!

Rachelle called to say, “I won’t be going to Lance’s birthday party because I’m too tired.”
I kept it simple and just said, “Okay.”
I figured it was better to just leave it at that even if I was sort of pissed.
I continued to do my ironing and other domestic chores.

I stopped by mom’s house for a breakfast nibble. Ashley was there and we were wearing matching outfits. I was wearing a white and gray sleeveless sweater with a pink outline. Ashley had a pink dress and a white jacket. We looked cute together.

When I first arrived at Margaret’s party I noticed a number of oriental people. Stephanie Bautista, my boss, was there with her two boys. Cindy Chow and her beau showed up (He’s ugly). Ryan Hargrave came, too. Tim Matthews was there. It was fun. The food was good and the roasted pig they had was displayed neatly. I was only there until 3PM. It was a delightful change from the usual. Ashley seemed to have a good time, too. I only felt bad when Margaret had to help me clean up Ashley’s ‘number two’ mess that she made in her diaper.

I went to mom’s house and Helen and Tony were there. Helen is bigger—but not that much bigger since the last time I saw her. She’s so sweet. I love my sister-in-laws. Tony fiddled with mom’s VCR in an attempt to fine-tune it. I left mom’s house for my pad and received a call from Dale.
Dale said, “We’re in the area. Do you want to go to the Ice Cream Dock with me, Dee and Andrew?”
“Sure, come on over.”
So, I went with them and that was fun. We also went to Robert’s place in Alameda for a while.
Dale said, “I want to see that movie MAD MAX. We should go see it.”
“Yeah, I want to see that. I haven’t seen it yet.”
We all stopped at Sherri’s house again. It was another brief visit. By 8:30PM I was on my way home.

Mike Miller called to say, “I won’t be joining the gym after all. I went over there yesterday. I spoke with that Lorraine girl.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, she said she didn’t understand you.”
“Why did she say that?”
“I think she said that you were supposed to call her for breakfast the other morning and you didn’t.”
“Oh, I forgot.”
“Well, she was talking in a kind of flirtatious way but I think it was just to get to know you better.”
I laughed.
Mike continued, “She talked more like saying you should break-up with Rachelle for a more mature relationship.”
“Give me a break! I can’t believe she said all of this to you.”
Now it was Mike’s turn to laugh.

Rachelle telephoned a little later. She was all pissed-off after I was honest with her, telling her all about Lorraine.
“Well, if you hadn’t led her on to begin with,” Rachelle yelled impolitely.
She kept going on and on…blah blah blah!

I escaped to mom’s house for a short visit and munched on a peanut butter and Knotts Berry Farm jelly sandwich. I watched the end of “The End”, a movie mom was watching.

When I returned home I decided to call Rachelle again. There was no answer. She eventually called me back but I was too tired to talk.

Dale called.
“I’m just checking to make sure you’re all packed for the trip.”
…blah blah blah…

I got off of the phone and fell asleep…finally.

How good and thoughtful he is. The world seems full of good men, even if there are monsters in it.
-Bram Stoker
"Dracula"

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Slip Slidin' Away

Q: "Where've you been the past few days?"
A: "Having sex with a secret agent."
-Stieg Larsson
"The Girl Who Kicked The Hornets' Nest"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 20, 1985
Saturday

I woke up at 9:45AM< and rushed out to go to GOMES TIRE SERVICE. I had to wait longer than usual this time. The service man said, “You were three quarts low and if went on much longer it might have effected your engine.”
“Oh great,” I said, thinking at least I got here in time.

It was raining and I think I need new tires because I slipped and slid away and lost control. It’s scary when that happens. I suddenly think of ‘Slip Slidin’ Away’. I love that Paul Simon song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuPJzzcV6jA

I would have gone biking today if it weren’t for the weather. Rain in July has mussed everyone’s plans! I must laugh at the thought of Rachelle’s picnic that was planned for today with her old chum, Julie, and Jim DeLeuze. A rainy picnic is just what she deserves.

I treated mom to breakfast at Ole’s Waffle Shop. It was nice. She’s a sweetie. After breakfast I accompanied mom to her house and wrapped the gift for Lance (Margaret Lai’s son). Dale called me from his friend’s house (Robert) who just moved to Alameda from Berkeley.
Dale insisted, “Why don’t you come over here!”
So, I went ahead and drove over. Dale and I played with Robert’s ‘Bionic Ear’ gadget. We also rummaged through all of his videotapes. He has an X-rated tape called “Like a Horse”. Strange! I had to laugh. We watched part of a low-budget horror film called “The Prey”. Then we watched all of “The Lathe of Heaven”, a movie with Bruce Davison (of WILLARD fame) who dreamed and his dreams became a reality. It was very interesting to me. I liked it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Anl0nKLABWo

Robert is about forty-five years old but he looks good for his age. Then again, he’s not exactly totally desirable or anything like that.

After the flick, Dale and I left with Andrew to Sherri’s house. Sherri was a sweetie. Ashley was all smiles. It was a brief visit though. Dale left relatively soon and I simply went home.

Rachelle came over to my place at about 8:30PM. I fell asleep on the couch. She was wearing black leather pants and a red top looking HOT (as usual). We went upstairs and took a shower together. Then we made love over my newly changed bed sheets. It felt good. We went downstairs and I beat her at a game of CHESS. I am sure no one will hear her tell about that game. We fooled around some more. She almost came while I was fingering her cli-t but she got scared. She loved the feeling though.
“I could feel the stretching at my feet. Is that how it feels for you.”
I said, “Yes.”

I went ahead and jo’d in front of her because I wanted to cum again. I love her. She loves me…but she’s so immature. Sometimes I think she doesn’t really care for me and Rodney. It’s almost like she’s interesting in testing a new specimen. If and when she does choose to test a new specimen it will be OVER between us.

Danee came over at 12:30AM or so. She was all ecstatic.
“Why are you so excited?” Rachelle asked.
“You won’t believe it. My new date said I looked like Susan Anton!”
“She’s gorgeous,” I said.
Danee continued, “Yeah, but I’m all upset because I feel like I have a ton of zits on my face.”
I didn’t say anything because she did have a bunch of zits on her face. Her braces didn’t help matters either. So now I’m wondering where the Susan Anton resemblance comes in. I guess it must be her hair, height and the five-inch boot heels. She brought along a Moosehead beer and I drank it up.


"We all have to hate now and then. Sometimes it's good to have a great big dead-on target to aim it at. Gets it all out of you, like a good purge that way you don't spread it around in little dinky ways on people you like."
-James Kirkwood
"Good times, Bad Times", a novel

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Pancakes Are My Specialty

"People live much of their lives in uncertainly."
-KYLE XY, Season II

Pancake
noun: a flat cake of thin batter fried on both sides on a griddle

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 19, 1985
Friday

Another day, another buck—but at least I am off for all of next week.  I need the break.

I’ve decided to go to Paris in September, too. That’ll be a nice change—I think.  And I have a usable passport, so what’s stopping me?   Golly-Gee-Whill-Ickers!  I’ll have a place to stay in Paris, too—with Paloma!

I went to lunch with Christi Williams today.   It was quaint.   What else can I say about it?   We took a walk over by the water. Hank Stuart, a coworker in my section, was nearby.
Later, Hank asked, “Hey Mike, what’s going on between you and Christi? I’m just wondering whether or not I should start a rumor.”
I simply laughed it off and said, “Oh nothing.”
Christi seems happily married.   She did, however, confess to a big fight they had over his wanting a rifle.
She said, “He always complains that he never gets what he wants and how I get everything.”
I laughed, “You know--I’m glad we’re friends and that you can feel comfortable telling me about it.”
I truly think our friendship will be the farthest extent that we will ever reach. I could probably wait for another marital fight when she’s feeling vulnerable.
I thought, “Fuck her, I’m not that way. I won’t bother interfering in a marriage!”

I went home and had to lie down to relax. I was so tired because I ended up speaking to Lorraine Garcia until 3AM the night before.
I keep thinking, “I don’t even like her!   She’s N.M.T.”
I wish Lorraine would sort of ‘leave me be’.

Mike Miller telephoned.
“Hey Mike, I’m not going to be able to make it to the gym after all. I am thinking of breaking-off with that whole gym contract idea after all.”
“Oh, okay. It’s no big deal. You have to do what you have to do.”
“Yeah, oh well.”
This didn’t stop me from going to the gym.  I had a good workout. I knew Rachelle wasn’t going to be there because she had to stay home and help mom make a checkerboard cake for the company they were having tomorrow (GMAB = Give Me A Break).

I had a lone workout. Randy talked to me for a while.   He’s the one who has a roommate who makes marijuana filled spaghetti. He’s also the one who called Rachelle my ‘old lady’.  He’s pretty nice now that I’ve talked to him a bit more. Dave, the blond one, who works at the gym, is nice, too.

Lorraine had been doing an aerobics class.  She accompanied me afterward to the AlphaBeta grocery store for juice and shampoo.  We returned to the gym to shower (not together, of course).  Then we went out to eat at the Black Angus and talked, getting to know each other better. We had a few good laughs. I think she feels that she’s Miss A-1 Maturity. She’s really a kind of a pip-squeak kind-of-gal. She was knocking Rachelle about her youth the whole time. Ironically, Lorraine is only a minute—or a shade bit older. I do admit that Rachelle does have a number of drawbacks on her maturity levels. After dinner with Lorraine she was all set to come and visit my place.
“You know,” I said, “I’d like you to come over but I’m kind of tired and I think I just need to turn in.”
“Okay, well next time maybe I can make breakfast for you. Pancakes are my specialty.”
I just smiled. I was hesitant after she made that comment about breakfast. I changed the subject. I didn’t really want her coming by my place for breakfast! I was beginning to think that IF she did come home with me I could have easily seduced her. She’s NMT. And on any normal given day I wouldn’t have really noticed or given her a double-take. I drove straight home.

I did make an attempt to telephone Rachelle. I don’t think her ringer was “on” or she was too tired to talk. So, I went to bed, too.


How to survive a French dinner party--"Just speak very loudly and quickly, and state your position with utter conviction, as the French do, and you'll have a marvelous time!"
-Julia Child
"My Life In France"

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Jammin'

"What's forbidden always tastes better anyway."
-Joanne Harris
"CHOCOLAT"

I heard this song in Paris recently. It made me feel good. I guess it was playing because summer is here. Jammin' by Bob Marley...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffCmFDzaYyQ&playnext_from=TL&videos=uB_n3nhujZE

Lyrics:
Ooh, yeah! All right!
We're jammin':
I wanna jam it wid you.
We're jammin', jammin',
And I hope you like jammin', too.
Ain't no rules, ain't no vow, we can do it anyhow:
I'n'I will see you through,
'Cos every day we pay the price with a little sacrifice,
Jammin' till the jam is through.

We're jammin' -
To think that jammin' was a thing of the past;
We're jammin',
And I hope this jam is gonna last.
No bullet can stop us now, we neither beg nor we won't bow;
Neither can be bought nor sold.
We all defend the right; Jah - Jah children must unite:
Your life is worth much more than gold.

We're jammin' (jammin', jammin', jammin')
And we're jammin' in the name of the Lord;
We're jammin' (jammin', jammin', jammin'),
We're jammin' right straight from Yah.
Yeh! Holy Mount Zion;
Holy Mount Zion:
Jah sitteth in Mount Zion
And rules all creation.

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 18, 1985
Thursday

All right! It’s just now registering that I have all of next week off. Hurrah! I am so unsure about going ‘with’ Dale on the road trip to Los Angeles. I won’t be able to do my own thing. Then again maybe it’s good that we do go together for inspirational support. He did LOVE his Pillsbury Doughboy Cookie Jar (or so-he-said over the phone last night). 

 Margaret Lai provided directions to her house for this coming Sunday. She’s a sweetie.

Dale and I watched the Wheel of Fortune at 10AM again this morning (during break time, in the break room). We also had lunch at ‘The Haven’ with Sue Leith tagging along. Dale seems to be moving from his old section (Pat’s) to Scott’s section. Sue is moving, too. “La Dee Dah”. There are a lot of human relations-type happenings, personality and value-conflicts that occur in our office. Dale may decide to become a Union Steward, beginning August 9th. That may—or may NOT—be such a good thing.

After work I telephoned Rachelle.
“Hi, are you going to the gym?”
“No, I just don’t feel like going tonight.”
“Ah, you’re just being lazy. It happens when you’re not doing a thing all day.”
She got pissed off when I said that. Oops. I loved it, though. When she gets mad now it’s almost a ‘turn-on’ (especially when it’s over such a trivial matter).

Oh! At 4:55PM Christi Williams (from the AIC) came over to my desk and asked me out for lunch tomorrow!
I said, “Okay, yes!”
It sounds like fun. I wouldn’t mind having an affair with her.

Mike Miller telephoned.
“Hey Mike, could you tell me about that Hawaii gym party again?”
I guess he decided he wanted to go. He stopped over my place and brought his wild n’ crazy friend from New Jersey, Greg Manischewitz, along. At first, we all watched the Wheel of Fortune on TV. Then we all went to the gym. It seemed to be really jammin’.

I saw Lorraine when I walked in and she started to ‘hang around’ me (and vice-versa). She’s really NMT (Not My Type) though. She’s nice and all. I just don’t have an all out gung-ho attraction. Then again, the more I see and talk with her the more I do feel an attraction. Her name is Lorraine Garcia. Yikes! Another Garcia.

Mike Miller and Greg Manischewitz liked my gym. They seemed to be having a really good time. Mike signed a contract and may very well be joining the Club. He’s going to the gym with me tomorrow. I think Greg may join the Club also but I didn’t see him sign a form of interest.

Afterwards, Mike, Greg and I went to SQUEEZER’S. Greg Manischewitz cracks me up. He showed off a list of ladies that he’s met while working at LUCKY’s Supermarket. All of the ones that had a STAR meant that he’d actually ‘laid’ them. He’s funny. I think I like him a lot. He has such an outgoing sort of nature about him. I’ve never met anyone like him.
“You know, my roommate, Marty, is moving out.”
Greg said, “I’d move in at three-hundred a month.”
“I’ll think about it,” I replied, thinking that $300 is better than ZERO.

We continued on to some hideaway World Airways Office to see Greg’s sister. We were delivering her a SQUEEZER’S cheeseburger, too. Then I was really surprised when Greg started to speak ‘Russian’ to his sister! He speaks it fluently. Impressive! He’s only lived in Alameda for five years now.

The three of us went to my house and I had a message on my answering machine from Lorraine Garcia.
“Hi Mike, its Lorraine. Could you call the gym when you get this message?”
I telephoned the gym but it was kind of rude now that I think about it. I mean, there was no urgency and Mike and Greg were still at my house.
I said, “Listen, can I call you back later?”
“Okay, sure.”

Greg and I have musical tastes in common. He likes “Make a Circuit With Me” by the Polecats and “Forever Young” by Alphaville. He’s so nice. 
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pVVeEQCsyg&playnext_from=TL&videos=o0lxqPmgxBQ

When Greg and Mike left I telephoned Rachelle.
“Oh, Hi, I was just on the phone with Art.”
“Oh, did you two end up going to lunch?”
“Yes, we had lunch today at Black Angus. He got a new truck and he gave me a kiss—but just a peck—before and after the date.”
“Oh yeah? Well, I bumped into Lorraine at the gym. I guess she knew about us.”
“She did?”
“Yeah, that’s what she said.”
There’s no way I would break-up with Rachelle for Lorraine. If I did break up with Rachelle it would be for other reasons. As a matter of fact (for grounds to break-up) I learned that Dale had done some more meddling.

Rachelle said, “I’m coming to San Francisco to see you for lunch tomorrow.”
I could tell that she knew—full well—that I had lunch plans with Christi Williams. Dale must have spilled the beans!  He’s a tub of gossip. The creep! I should NOT go to L.A. with him!

Weeds and wheat cannot grow peacefully together. Any gardener could tell you the same thing.
-Joanne Harris
"CHOCOLAT"

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Another Time Or Place

"We are born to stretch upward to the skies."
-Honroe de Balzac
"Seraphita"

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 17, 1985
Wednesday

Hurrah! Today is my dentist appointment and my luncheon date with Christi Williams. And my first half of my day will be to attend the Telemarketing Seminar. Hurrah, it’s a kind of a freebie day.

The seminar was very generic. It included the basics on how to answer your telephone properly and ideally make that sale. The instructor, Judy, was really nice, “uppity” and vibrant.

After the seminar concluded I met with Christi and we ate at Don Miguel’s. She was wearing a black dress and was all ‘made up’ very pretty-like. I realize now that she reminds me of actress Lesley Ann Warren (but a blond version).

Christi surprised me though. She has an IFP (Immediate Family Plan). She has a two-year old son named Ryan. And to top it off, she is married! Now this information certainly came out of ‘left field’. We had a good time at lunch though. She is sweet and I do like her. Like she and I both agreed, “Had we met in another time or place…who knows what could have been?”
Perhaps her son, Ryan, and my niece, Ashley can meet up sometime in the future. Ha-ha.

After lunch I went to mom’s house and watched a part of Santa Barbara (some new soap-opera) with mom. I left when Dad woke up and started to pout about my utility bills. They are being paid but he likes to complain.

I went home to change clothes for the gym visit. It was not very crowded when I arrived at 4PM. Rachelle pulled a ‘no show’ once again. I introduced myself to Dave. He’s nice. Lorraine also talked with me again. It’s funny how I had never noticed her before. Then again it seems that ever since May my eyes were only on Rachelle. Before that my eyes were solely on my gym workouts or (?). I found myself speaking to both Dave and Lorraine about the forthcoming Hawaiian gym party.
“I will probably go ahead and show up for the Hawaiian bash,” I said aloud, but thinking that I was not sure if I’d really show up at all.

I had told Mary Halverson about the Hawaiian party at the gym. I also told Mike Miller about it, including sending him a card. I mentioned it to Ryan Hargrave, too. I don’t think Rachelle wants to attend, so we’ll see.

After my gym workout I tried calling Rachelle but she was not at home. I went to MACY’s and got Lance (Margaret Lai’s son) a couple of outfits. Then I bought myself five shirts and two pairs of pants at the MACY’s Clearance Place. My total was $99.06. What a deal!

By now it was 8:30PM and I went home to crash on my bed. I telephoned Rachelle one more time.
“Hi, I tried calling you after the gym.”
“Oh. Guess what?”
“What?”
“Art invited me to lunch.”
“That’s nice,” I said, thinking that she’d actually accept the invitation. What a trustworthy bitch. All I could think in my head is that she’s leading a bunch of strays on and along. I hate her sometimes. Sometimes I wish Christi wasn’t married. I write this only because Christi is much more my type than Lorraine. Rachelle and I didn’t talk for very long. I was tired and went to bed.

Oh, my dentist said, “You’re A-Okay!”

Q: "Your girlfriend?"
A: "Not exactly. She's married. I'm more a friend and occasional lover."
-Stiegl Larsson
"The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo"

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